The HBCK
by Kutsu
Summary: What's the HBCK, you ask? Why, the Homo-Bi Club of Konoha. This year, it's Naruto's job to find new recruits within the university's freshmen. That, and finally convince a certain Uchiha to come to the dark side... They have cookies after all.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey, people. Don't worry, I'm not back, just re-reading my old fics, tidying them up to make them look good enough to post...**

**You might want to know, this fic is based on true events, and although the characters are changed, I'm fairly certain the original ones won't mind me using my personal memories. They, for one, assume. So read on.**

**Disclaimer: I still don't own Naruto. Working on it though.  
**

* * *

"Who's left-handed in this room?"

The voice brought most of the auditorium's attention back to the stage. The lone young man standing there waved back at his audience, grinning. His bright orange T-shirt stood out against the darkness of the stage, right along with his golden hair and -though only the first few rows could see- his bright blue eyes. Still smiling, he turned to his companion, a fair-skinned, pink-haired woman who had been on the side of the auditorium before he brought attention upon her. "And they say first years can't shut up," he remarked gleefully. To his audience, he added, "No offense meant; the theory was built on last year's juniors, and I was part of the lot."

"You were the reason they actually made that theory," the young woman sighed. "Could we do what we're supposed to?"

"Right." The blond turned back towards the auditorium, and its four hundred occupants. "Welcome to Konoha University, all of you. I'm sure you've already received proper introductions to your new home" -there was a common nod- "so I won't bother with it. Preceding us were also some of the numerous clubs you'll find on campus. But before I introduce ours, I need to run a little survey." He grinned again, and at that moment, every single female of the room had come to a definite conclusion. The guy was freaking hot.

"Who's left-handed?" the blond asked again.

Hands slowly rose, none of them right. The sapphire eyes quickly scanned them, making a rough estimation. "A third," he then said. "Now, who speaks more than one language?"

Another set of hands rose while others lowered, and the blond pursued, "Who's ever traveled out of the country?"Then, "Who doesn't have American as his first nationality?"

The number of hands lessened, but clearly the blond wasn't bothered about it.

"Who is either homosexual or bisexual?"

This time all hands went down. Eyes wandered, however, as each student observed his neighbors in order to spot the oddities hidden within the mass. When they returned to the stage, they saw that both the man and woman had they hands firmly raised in the air.

"Funny how we got the same results last year," the blond man remarked, his voice amused. Then looked at his audience with serious eyes. "According to statistics," he said, his voice suddenly becoming grave, "twenty of you are lying." He lowered his arm. "Our club's aim is precisely this. Even if you don't have inner problems with your sexual orientation, you might not want your peers to know about it; our club, HBCK, or" -he let a new grin form upon his face- "the Homo-Bi Club of Konoha, is a place where you can live and interact with people without needing to hide your orientation. People there will consider it normal for you to be gay, or lesbian, or whatever. It's actually the straight people who look weird there."

"And we usually behave like a normal club," the pink-haired woman added. "The meetings are on Thursday evenings, from five to eight, in building 403, on the third floor; you'll see the club as soon as you get there. Most activities are card games, video games, parties and such, though sometimes we do try to be serious and participate in events designed to fight homophobia."

"Which is, needless to say, forbidden on campus." The blond shrugged, then brusquely looked up again. "Questions, now! We know you have them, and won't dare ask in public, so we'll do our best to telepathically hear your voices and answer you. First off, no, you don't necessarily need to be gay, lesbian or bi to join this club. We've got one member who's frustratingly straight -his name's Sasuke Uchiha, he's sitting among you guys and is going to kill me if I point him out- who's been with us since the beginning of last year. And in case you're wondering, he's only sitting where he's sitting to see how funny I can look in front of four hundred strangers. _He_ comes only for the cookies, and he's still welcome, so anyone slightly more interested is of course perfectly fine. You can also come only for the cookies, though, we don't mind."

"Heterophobia is also forbidden on campus," the woman added with a small smile. "Including within the club."

"If you want to contact us" -hopeful female eyes snapped up- "the club's e-mail and phone number is presently being posted on the screen" -rose even more, then lowered hurriedly to grab a pen- "and you'll be seeing us outside for details, once you're done with the other clubs here. Don't forget, you can come at any time of the year, this year, next year, of even a month before you graduate and leave definitely, there will always be someone to welcome you on Thursday evenings, so don't forbid yourself to come whenever you feel like it. No need to hurry, we're just here to help."

"If you need to call us," the woman added, "His name is Naruto Uzumaki" -new frenetic scribbling- "and mine is Sakura Haruno." This time the males did react. So what if she wasn't straight, they knew they'd convince her someday.

And that was how the entire story began.

In any given community or group, might it be schools or offices, families or people united in a same place by politics or religion, there exists a single, unalterable law that everyone knows, acknowledges and follows. People talk.

What they talk about, however, is anyone's guess. In Konoha University, most first-year female gossip turned around the amazing subject of the two eye-catching seniors that had caught their attention since the very first day. Everyone had seen Naruto Uzumaki. Everyone kept seeing him, too. In addition to the HBCK, he was also on the swim team, participated in the Konoha University magazine, and in several other dozens of activities no one could ever recall entirely.

It seemed that the blond knew literally everyone on campus. After a month or so, even the first years almost all called him by his first name, and he never failed to miss a greeting. Males were more wary of him, but soon relaxed when it became very clear the blond wasn't interested in them for the moment. His homosexuality had never brought him scorn, since people were usually overwhelmed by his overly cheerful attitude, and was now considered as an unalterable fact concerning the blond.

The unknown variable of the problem, however, was Sasuke Uchiha. The one people -students of all ages- were trying to figure out. None of the first years had managed to identify him during the introduction week, and it had taken a trip to the HBCK to get a glance at the discreet man. The discovery had been a shock.

Moon to Naruto's sun, Sasuke's pitch black eyes were as cold as the blue-eyed blond's were warm, raven hair also contrasting with his friend's blond locks, and his heart completely closed to the rest of the world. Beautiful and dark, he immediately became the common heartthrob of the female first years. Sadly, they were soon brought to their senses by their seniors.

Sasuke Uchiha did not date. Anyone. Girls had been numerous and insistent for quite a period, before he stopped coming to the HBCK in order to get some peace, biting off several heads in the process. This had led to several conclusions from the gossiping crowds, as several people began to doubt the blond's words concerning his friend. Some even went to suggest they were actually together, and simply trying to avoid publicity. But then, that was before the two of them were spotted in building 334 during their lunch period.

Building 334 was old, and had been abandoned years ago by the post-graduate portion of the university. The older adults had offered it to their younger peers, and the results had been the nesting of most university clubs within its walls. Video games, computers and televisions, card games and RPG's crowded the building, whose maximum capacity was reached as soon as the clock struck noon.

The main room was empty but for the numerous sofas and low tables that littered the floor; and was mostly used to and play cards. A dull pounding filled the air, originating from the music room at the end of one of the halls, which amplified considerably every time someone opened the door.

The main table was almost always occupied by the same group of seniors, composed notably of the famed Uchiha. His seat was always the same; a large, black sofa whose back had been flattened like a pancake, thus allowing him to lay back completely upon it. Better, the sofa faced the table and wall, which meant he didn't have to meet the eyes of the numerous girls observing him, and glare back to get a semblance of tranquility. That way, everyone had peace.

On this particular day, the game played had been Black Jack, and the dark-haired man had declined his hand, deciding to use the hour left before classes effectively and take a nap. This behavior wasn't odd for the Uchiha, and wasn't commented upon. None of the female observers dared take pictures, remembering what had happened the last time (yes, the discovery of Sasuke had come at a painful price), and merely continued observing him with tender expressions.

"Rise and shine, my holy minions, your Lord has arrived, spreading his eternal light across your forsaken paths- Ow!" Naruto entered the room with a hand placed protectively upon his head, and wincing as the woman accompanying him thundered past.

"Do you have to announce yourself this loudly every single time?" Sakura growled. "My ears are way too delicate to endure your daily hollering!"

"You don't complain when Ino's shouting," he protested.

The emerald eyes glared. "First off, there's no way you can compare your voice to hers," she snapped, walking over to the group of seniors. "Secondly, she's careful _not_ to bother people if I ask her. I don't think you even caught on to the fact that no one likes to hear you scream."

"Do I bother you?" Naruto asked the room, grinning sweetly as he turned to face each of them. In the face of his smile, no one could willingly nod.

"You bother _me_." Sasuke hadn't moved, hadn't even opened his eyes. But his previously impassive face had deepened into a frown. "Shut up."

Naruto turned again, and this time seemed to take notice of the senior group. "Hey guys." Walking over to shake hands with everyone, he followed the same path Sakura had used, halting behind the Uchiha's couch. This time, he was careful to keep his voice soft as he said, "Wake up, Sleeping Beauty." To Sasuke's annoyed growl, he smirked and caught the pale face, swiftly leaning down and giving the other man an upside-down kiss.

The Uchiha jolted, and Naruto immediately pulled back, laughing. "You shouldn't leave yourself open like that," he remarked.

"I usually don't get sexually harassed in public," the other male growled, wiping his mouth angrily. "Normal people try to act decently." And with another glare, he sank back into the sofa, closing his eyes again. "You try getting near my mouth again and I'll rip your balls off," he then growled in warning. "Don't think I won't dare."

"Roger that, boss." Naruto smirked again. "So I suppose this is fine?" And beneath the half-horrified, half-admirative (and at least very appreciating) female eyes, he slipped his hands between the Uchiha's legs.

Again Sasuke jerked, and, with dangerously narrowed pitch black eyes, got to his feet under the males' laughs. "That's it," he growled, before leaping towards the blond.

"He's raping me!" Naruto yelled as he was pinned to the floor, laughing and twisting in anguish as pale fingers attacked his ribs.

"Nah, he ain't," the senior known as Kiba -whose last name, along with all of his peer's, had never been uttered inside the 334, and was therefore unknown- replied in an amused voice. "You wouldn't be screaming this hard if he was."

Next to him, Shikamaru, also labeled as the most lazy genius on earth, chuckled. "Maybe he would," he said with a small smile. The rest of the group laughed.

"Quit making fun of me!" Naruto yelled, still trying his best to escape the rampaging Uchiha. "Why can't you help me instead of laughing your asses off?"

"You're doing fine on your own," Sakura remarked with an evil smile. "Get 'im, Uchiha."

Sasuke neither nodded nor shook his head, and kept advancing, focused solely on his murderous intent. One might have thought to argue, given the current situation, that Naruto wasn't in any kind of mortal danger; getting tickled was hardly lethal.

But that was judging without considering Sasuke Uchiha's skill. The onlookers of the scene were fairly certain that, given enough time, the blond would defy all laws of common sense and simply die of laughter. The pale man obviously knew how to make use of his fingers, although perhaps Naruto would beg to differ.

Five minutes later, the cries of agony was enough to reason even the evilist hearts -save for the murderous Uchiha, of course- and the 334's occupants finally bothered to get to the feet and pull the blond's source of suffering away from him. Sasuke made sure he gave his victim a last, thoroughly poisonous glare before abandoning his vocation to kill the other male.

Naruto straightened, panting as though he'd just run a marathon, face flushed from his breathlessness. But when he looked up towards his opposite self, he was smiling. "Had to give you a bit of affection," he told the still slightly fuming Uchiha. "Seeing you won't be allowed to come to the HBCK for a while." The smile was replaced by an apologetic expression. "We got a new member," he explained as Sasuke frowned. "And he doesn't want to see you."

"Why not?"

Naruto shook his head. "I can't tell." He looked up, blue eyes suddenly worried. "It won't be too long," he promised. "Just until he copes with- with it."

Sasuke's eyes gazed solemnly towards the suddenly nervous blond for a few seconds, before nodding, curtly. "He's got priority," he said before Naruto could open his mouth to apologize. "But you better bring me all the cookies I'm missing." The obsidian orbs then narrowed. "And no more 'affective compensation' from you, otherwise I'm barging in on him this week."

Naruto nodded swiftly. "Promise," he said, and for once, it was amazing to see how serious he sounded.

* * *

**Yeah...so except for Sasuke's murderous rampages -and presence in the HBCk- everything really happened (though Naruto's actually two different people, but that's okay). Though from now on, I'm going to have to invent a little. That is, if anyone's interested, of course. So review!**

**Note: For those waiting for Symbiosis' next chap, I'm sorry to say the story's on hiatus, for cause of major screw up (never continue a fic you started ages ago). Um...Yeah. So sorry for the fans.**

**BUT I'm almost done with what I have been working on while I should have been working on Symbiosis. The name's the Joys of Parenthood, and is also inspired from a true story (though this time it's only inspired, my imagination's way more responsible for what you'll get to read). Expect adult Naru and Sasu and Saku (and Itachi, and Kakashi, and a bit of Fugaku Uchiha, but he's gonna suffer a bit from his sons, hehe...) and in my opinion my second best fic so far (aside from Just an Act).**

**So, once again, review, and I might write a bit more, finish some fics and all. **

**And to finish, a peek on my little sister's infinite wisdom:**

**"All of these noodles you're eating are one more cake you won't get in heaven."**

**(Yeah, she wanted to eat them)  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, so since some of you demanded that I get my fingers moving to type this (within reason, of course, I'd promised to turn it in ages ago), I suddenly felt inspired. I always feel inspired when my classes start again. So, the end of this two-shot (obviously), please enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I didn't get Naruto for Christmas. Sigh. Next year, perhaps.**

**Warning: There's smutt down there, and not for the hetero-friendly. Ye been warn'd.**

**Have fun.**

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"There they are!"

Building 334 noisier than usual, which was profoundly odd, as the seniors hadn't even arrived yet. Despite the saddening absence of their idol, the female freshmen had found something to oogle at, and were presently all looming over the university's monthly magazine. Or, more precisely, inspecting the pictures that had been taken during some unknown swimming competition that had taken place on the previous week.

"There he is!" one of them squealed, loudly enough to draw attention from the room's remaining occupants. "I told you Naruto had said he was on the swim team-"

"He looks like a bird," another sighed, staring dreamily at the full-page picture. Sure enough, on the picture was the Uchiha. The photographer had shot him with his back turned, in mid-dive. The effect was spectacular.

Arms outstretched as though opening to take flight, Sasuke's figure soared several clear inches above any of his competitors -or at least those that could be seen in the picture- hair blowing on either side of his head.

"They say he crossed a third of the pool before hitting the water," the girl holding the magazine told the others. "And even after he still was faster."

"He's so cool. The first swimmer has to be fast, right?"

"Yeah, Romeo went after him. What's his real name, by the way?"

"Rock Lee." There was a common eye roll, then gazes lowered to the second page. Rock Lee was swimming in visible fury, a near half-pool in front of his adversaries, causing more splashes than anyone else. The girls laughed.

"Turn the page," one then ordered. "I know Naruto's the last swimmer, who's the third?"

"Neji Hyuuga," was the automatic reply. "He's hot too."

The page turned, and a collective gasp emerged. "You call that hot?" someone asked. "That guy's a freaking god! He's almost as good-looking as Sasuke!" She was hastily shushed, the other girls glancing guiltily around as though she had spoken heresy.

But Neji Hyuuga was hot. He rarely came to building 334, but when he did was always accompanied by Sasuke Uchiha. The two seemed to get along. The picture that had been taken of him showed him pushing himself out of the pool, water pouring from his face and body like shiny silver tendrils.

"He's _beautiful_," was a sighed remark. "And Naruto's cute too..."

The blond had obviously been shot right after winning the race. In the next lane, his opponents still swam furiously, but Naruto had already discarded his goggles (they hovered a few inches away from his fingers on the pictures), and had apparently thrown himself back, provoking an entire wall of water to rise against his back as he grinned furiously, fist raised in victory.

"Too bad he's a lost cause. Are there more pictures?"

A grin formed on the magazine owner's face. "You bet." The page was turned again, and this time, text accompanied smaller shots. Results, biography of Konoha team's swimmers -which they all absorbed reverently- and the scenes that had followed. Naruto diving back into the water to celebrate. Naruto, underwater, with people cheering on the edge of the pool. The same picture, but this time faces had grown worried, and a pair of feet poking out of the surface told the onlookers someone had dived. Sasuke holding a seemingly unconscious Naruto to the edge of the pool, with chaos on the sides. And then-

"Ohmigodhe'skissinghim!"The unintelligible squeals had been uttered in sheer unison, the reason for it being that the shot had appeared only after the page had been turned again. It took up the magazine's entire width. Naruto's unconscious face was the only visible part of his body. Behind him, Sasuke Uchiha crouched, eyes lowered and obviously worried, still dripping from his most recent trip into the water. His hands rested on the blonds face, holding it still as he leaned down. There was no misinterpreting the action.

"They didn't kiss." The disappointment was clear in the sighed remark. "Sasuke realized that Naruto was faking just before contact, and he threw him back into the pool."

Small sounds -of either disappointment or relief- erupted from the female group, but any further reaction was curt short when a pale arm suddenly snaked through the group and caught hold of the magazine. The girls turned, and flinched. Sasuke Uchiha glared back, his face no different than the one he'd made when he'd first been discovered.

"What is this?" he asked in a slow, poisonous voice. "Who shot these?"

Before anyone could answer, however, a deafening pounding resonated from the hall, and the main room's door burst open.

"Teme!" came the immediate cry. "Did you see-" Naruto's blue eyes immediately fell on the magazine his teammate was holding. He grinned unabashedly. "Aren't they great?" he asked. "Everyone told me they were, that guy's a real genius, I can't believe how much-"

"You know the photographer?" the Uchiha asked, his voice liquid ice. "Good. I need to murder him."

"You're not going anywhere," Naruto retorted, rolling his eyes. "The pics are great, and if you have anything to say about them you should've stopped him at the pool. Besides, you're way too evil for me to help you kill anyone."

"Don't worry," Sasuke replied in a cynical tone. "I'm feeling expeditive today. He won't suffer too long." Then, the black eyes narrowed. "It's him, isn't it? Your new recruit?"

"Shoot." Naruto sucked his head, meek. "How d'you-"

"I'm a genius." The tone was incredibly dry. "How many people would've had the nerve to shoot you while you were lying, _apparently _unconscious, on the floor? Only those who knew you goddamn plan, and you don't tell these to anyone who doesn't share your orientation."

Naruto smirked. "It nearly worked, didn't it?" he asked, azure orbs twinkling. "How much time did you give me?"

Sasuke shrugged, glancing at the crumpled magazine resting between his fingers. "Three minutes."

"That's it?" The blue orbs widened with indignation as the female onlookers gasped. Naruto turned to them. "I don't only swim," he informed them. "I also do free-diving competitions. Apnea," he added when they frowned. "My record's seven minutes and thirty-six seconds. Which isn't bad," he then said, considering. "But seriously, teme. _Three _minutes? I thought I'd passed that stage in tenth grade."

"You'd just finished your lap," the other man growled. "And don't tell me you were entirely well when I pulled you out, your lips were becoming blue."

"Yeah, I know, and it'd have been worth it if you'd gone according to plan," Naruto grumbled. "At least Sai got the best part on tape-" He shut up abruptly as the Uchiha stared.

"Sai?" Sasuke repeated, startled. "As in Sai Root? He's the new guy?"

Naruto did frenetic shushing motions, teeth planted firmly in his lower lip due to his slip of tongue. "Quiet," he pleaded. "You want everyone to hear? It's a secret, bastard!"

"Yeah, I just saw how you deal with those." Despite this, Sasuke had lowered his voice. Only those surrounding them had heard, and Naruto did a quick job out of convincing them to stay quiet about it. The blond then turned back to the Uchiha.

"Don't tell?" he asked in a pleading voice. "Please?"

Sasuke released a dark sigh. "I don't see why I should," he finally grumbled.

Despite the recent events, nothing kept Sasuke from performing his weekly ritual of driving Naruto back to his house after HBCK reunions. Habit, if not loyalty, had brought him to the building despite his ban. Even though he was now forbidden to attend the reunions themselves, he knew that Naruto stayed at least half an hour after everyone had gone home to clean up. That way, the shy kid could always make a run for it before he got there.

He parked the black mustang in front of the building, as he always did, and mounted the steps that led to the upper part of the building. Reaching the door, he froze.

The large piece of wood separating inside from outside had its qualities and faults. For one, it was so thin that he could hear everything that went on on the other side of the frame, but it did hide his figure effectively. And hide he did need; he didn't think Naruto would have appreciated his bursting in just yet, not when he'd just heard the blond exclaim, "Seriously, dude, you need to lick it slower or the end's going to fall off!"

"I'm trying," a quiet, unfamiliar voice replied. "But seriously that thing's way too good to do it slowly. Are you sure I just can't bite it off?"

"No, you can't." Naruto's voice was amused. "Come on, you need to finish it before we leave." He groaned. "My hand's all sticky," he complained.

"I told you you should have used a napkin," the other male said, his voice slightly muffled. But the two of them suddenly shut up. Reason being Sasuke had accidentally kicked the railing by attempting to back away.

"You heard a car just before?" Naruto wondered cautiously. There was a pause. "If that's Sasuke he's going to kill us." Shuffling. "Get behind the sofa," the blond then ordered in a much quieter voice. "I'll check."

"You don't need to check," was the Uchiha's dry comment. "It's me. Open the door only if you're decent, idiot."

He'd obviously startled the two of them. A brief pause followed his statement, before Naruto seemed to shake himself.

"I need to wash my hand," he told Sasuke. "Just a second."

Doing his best to cast the images the recent events had summoned into his head, Sasuke closed his eyes, and waited for the door to open.

When it did, he came face to face with a red-faced, slightly panting Naruto. His hands still shone with humidity, and he had the typical look of a kid who'd been caught with a hand in the cookie jar. "What are you doing here?" he asked, trying to hide his unease beneath confusion.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "What does it look like I'm doing here, idiot?" he asked. "I thought you needed a car to get back home. I'm not waiting until one o'clock."

"Oh." The blue eyes had widened in realization. "Sorry, teme, I thought you wouldn't bother, so I didn't warn you." He smiled. "Sai's got a car. He'll drive me."

One word had caught the Uchiha's attention. "Sai?" he repeated slowly. "As in Sai Root? He's the new guy?"

Naruto flinched, and swore. He looked up, blue eyes pleading. "Could you keep quiet about it?" he asked, bringing his hands together. "Please?"

Sasuke knew that voice. It was the only one Naruto used when he stopped acting like the naïve idiot everyone believed him to be. If he used it, then the subject of discussion was important. He narrowed his eyes. He already knew how the guy looked like. He was quite famous for it, too.

"Your fly's open," he finally remarked, in the driest tone he could muster. "Glad to see you've finally found a replacement. Good night then." He turned away, refusing to acknowledge Naruto's confused utterance of his name, and strode back towards his car.

Sitting down, he saw, out of the corner of his eye, another figure step next to the one he knew, at the top of the stairs. A figure that, despite the fact that he was mostly unfamiliar to, he recognized immediately. Few people carried the feat of resembling him, after all. He averted his eyes, focusing on the steering wheel and the road ahead until building 403 was out of sight.

Tension was in the air. That, at least, was quite clear. Building 334 had never been this quiet in living memory, not with this quantity of people inside it. But for some reason, silence had finally succeeded in imposing its tyrannical law upon those who dwelt inside.

Naruto Uzumaki stood, quite still, in what had to be the geometrical center of the room. Not that anyone cared. In front of him, and looking thoroughly pissed by the blond's presence was Sasuke Uchiha. The raven-haired man had narrowed his eyes in such a hostile fashion that his blond counterpart had refrained from saying whatever he'd intended when he'd first entered the room. Wordlessly, Sasuke got to his feet, picking up his bag. As soon as the eye connection broke, however, the other man found his voice.

"Where are you going?" he asked, sounding slightly annoyed.

"Away, obviously." The Uchiha's voice was as crisp and dry as autumn leaves. "We wouldn't want me to come across your new boyfriend, would we?"

"He's not my boyfriend," Naruto snapped. "And I need to talk to you, bastard. It won't happen if you keep avoiding me."

A dark eyebrow rose. "You need to talk to me?" Sasuke repeated, coolly ironical. "Funny how you're the only one feeling that way."

"Are you _jealous_?" The question was a bomb in the way-too-quiet room. Sasuke whirled around, but Naruto didn't allow him to speak. "We aren't dating," he growled. "I swear to God there isn't anything like that between us."

The second eyebrow rose. "You don't seem to get this part straight, Uzumaki," came the soft, glacial reply. "You don't need to deny any of your potential romances to me. I don't care."

The blond glared. "Then why the hell aren't you talking to me anymore?"

Sasuke released a small sigh, and looked up, straight into the azure gaze, his own eyes twin pools of oblivion. "It's not that complicated," he informed the other man. "Even you should be able to figure it out." And stormed out of the room.

"You make things look easy, Uchiha, but I wouldn't mind an explanation, for one." Neji Hyuuga sighed as he sat down next to his friend, wearing the usual half-smile that had so many girls wooing him.

Sasuke looked up grudgingly from the book he'd been spending his attention on. "Do I owe you anything?" he asked in a snappy tone.

"Well, considering I managed to keep our tempestuous blond from dashing after you once you ran out, you could say so," he replied slyly. "And to tell you the truth, you were making me curious. _Are _you jealous?"

The book snapped shut, and promptly directed itself at Neji's head. Thankfully, the other man blocked Sasuke's vengeful arm in time.

"You do seem offended," the Hyuuga remarked. "But it doesn't change your behavior. If you aren't jealous, then I suggest you stop acting like it."

Sasuke handed him a dark look. Then lowered his arm. "Just because Naruto's gay doesn't mean we need to fall in love," he then growled. "I admit, I miscalculated people's idiocy. Usually people settle for heterosexual couples. As soon as a guy and a girl become friends, everyone starts believing they're going to date each other. They do in movies, Neji, but not always in real life. And I'm straight. So can you stop thinking Naruto and I are anything past friends?"

Neji smirked. "I didn't say anything about romance," he replied in a casual tone. "I mean, I didn't think your relationship was anything else than one-sided love. But for you recent behavior, of course." The smile faded. "I'd rather you didn't fight with him," the man then added. "We need to be a team, Sasuke, or we'll lose the next competition." He sighed. "Thank God you've still got a few months to make up. But I'd like to know what the problem is before things get too out of hand. I still have nightmares from the last time."

Sasuke looked away. Fights between him and Naruto always had this eerie quality of being as memorable as any hurricane that swept the country. You didn't forget them easily. 'Last time', as Neji referred to, had been at the end of middle school. Sasuke's father had decided his youngest son could afford better than the local high school, and had sent him to the other side of the country. Still directed by his family's contempt, Sasuke had offered no opposition to the idea, and it had been Naruto who'd reacted against Fugaku's wishes.

The weeks of hateful deadly silence that had followed -terrifying for anyone who'd known the blond at that time- and the final showdown had been carved in Konoha Middle School's archives so that no one would ever, _ever_ forget what it cost people to move away from their friends. In any case, after the storm provoked by the two of them, Sasuke's profile had been refused in most private institutions -they had managed to tear the cafeteria apart, after all- and he'd followed Naruto to the local high school, to the blond's obvious glee.

"I'm friends with that idiot, aren't I?" Sasuke finally asked, somber.

Neji blinked, but knew better than to ask why his friend was questioning such obvious truths. "Sure," he murmured in agreement.

"Apart from all the lovey-dovey bullshit," the Uchiha insisted, still dark. "We're friends, aren't we?"

"That's how I would call it," Neji confirmed quietly.

Sasuke's dark head snapped to the side, as though searching for counsel, then down, then up, eyes locking with his friend's pale gaze. "What he's doing," he then growled. "What he's been doing, for the past fucking _weeks_, I don't call that friendship. He started avoiding me long before I did anything. He's hiding things-"

"Friends are allowed to keep secrets from each other," Neji put in somberly. "I know we don't tell each other everything, but I like to consider us as friends."

"I know," Sasuke grumbled. "But if you hide something, you make sure I don't know it's there, don't you?"

A thin eyebrow rose. "You stumbled across his little protégé?"

A shrug.

"Overheard," Neji corrected himself. "I take it you heard enough to know they were dating."

Another shrug. Neji took it as a reluctant yes.

"Naruto said they weren't."

"Maybe they split," Sasuke replied dryly. "Or maybe they're just having sex. Naruto mustn't count those the same way we do."

"You know that's not true." Neji straightened in his chair. "I'm going to sound like Naruto for a few seconds, and see what that does." He cleared his throat and pointed an accusing finger towards the other man. "He hasn't flirted with you in ages, and you're resenting him for it." To his surprise, Sasuke simply stared at him. Neji's second eyebrow rose. "Are you saying-"

"You're spitting nonsense," the Uchiha snapped. "I didn't want to waste my breath answering to that."

"I'm fairly certain part of you did get used to it," the other man insisted. "You did tense a bit when he came in."

"Hopefully he finally got the message that I wanted him to stop," Sasuke replied, annoyed. "But that doesn't mean I don't have to brace myself, just in case."

Neji sighed, shaking his head, and returned to more important matters. "You still practice, don't you? We don't see you in training anymore."

Sasuke replied with a curt nod. "I come after you close up," he replied.

"It'd be easier for everyone if you just-"

"I got tired of him staring at my ass, all right?" Suddenly the raven-hair was angry. He sprang to his feet, and picked up his bag. "And I'd hoped to spend my lunch hour in relative peace, thank you very much!" He stormed out again.

Several seconds passed in silence before Neji released yet another sigh. "I'll have tried, Uzumaki," he whispered to himself. "But it looks like he's angrier than either of us were willing to bet."

The swimming pool was dark when the black mustang parked in front of it, and yet another car remained inside the parking lot. Frowning as he stepped out of his vehicle, Sasuke inspected its neighbor, and recognized Neji's silver BMW. He frowned.

The car's owner waited for him at the building's entrance, hair still humid, but dressed warmly enough for the season.

"Making sure I actually do come to swim?" Sasuke asked dryly. "I'm not five, you know."

"I thought you might want to spare yourself the trouble of fetching the key," Neji replied with a smile, holding up his own. "They still put it in the same place?"

Sasuke grimaced and nodded. The pool staff had given their team one key, so that they could swim long after anyone had left for bed. Since they were four, and since there were other people who were also permitted to use the pool outside opening hours, another spare key had been placed in a secret location near the entrance, which turned out to be a small niche next to the roof. Which meant that anyone who wanted to use it needed not only to know exactly where it was, but also had to be ready for several minutes of tree-climbing and perilous balancing several feet above solid ground, in order to fetch them. A trip that Sasuke gratefully avoided.

"You're done, I suppose," the Uchiha added. He hadn't bothered to hide the fact that he'd only stopped coming to team training sessions because of Naruto. Swimming alone was better for overall progression, since there wasn't anyone to distract him, but it was profoundly dull. He wouldn't have minded if Neji accompanied him.

"I'm done," the other man confirmed. But he wasn't smiling, as he would have done on a normal occasion. He hesitated, then added, "Naruto's still inside."

Sasuke froze. His first reflex was to look around for another car, or a motorcycle, before remembering that the blond had neither, and always went to the pool either by bus or in someone else's car. He turned back to Neji, who didn't look happy at all.

"Listen, Sasuke," he sighed. "Frankly, I don't give a damn on what's going on inside your head concerning that idiot. But I'm worried about him. He's spending as much time breathing as not these days, and not only inside the pool. I spotted him doing it in the showers, too, and I can't be sure, but I think he also does it in class. This is going past the point where I can just assume he's training for whatever competition's coming up."

Obsidian eyes met pale lavender ones. "And you left him in there despite this?" Sasuke asked.

Neji shrugged. "I'm thinking along the lines that's he's waiting for you," he replied. "He didn't tell me not to warn you, though, and I think he's waiting to see whether you'll come. But if you don't go in there, I'm going back to make sure he doesn't try to drown himself."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "He's not so stupid as to-"

"You haven't seen him!" Neji snapped. "How could you have, seeing how much trouble you go through to avoid him? He doesn't talk during practice, anymore, Sasuke. I know he keeps the cheerful demeanor outside the pool, but here it's been quiet as a graveyard since you left. After I failed at making you forgive him for whatever he'd done, he stopped asking me why you were mad at him and just fucking closed up on us." The pale eyes blazed. "This is Naruto we're talking about. The one who didn't hesitate before he jumped in to rescue Kiba from those dogs, who didn't think about possible repercussions on himself when he took Hinata away from the guys bullying her, who saved you from both your father and that bloody fire not five months ago-"

"I get the point," Sasuke cut him. With the last sentence, he'd instinctively reached for the base of his neck, where the only remainder of the fire episode lay, still smarting at times. Naruto's was on his belly. A huge sun-shaped scar, which was another, small reason to why Sasuke now had trouble seeing his torso bare.

"Then are you going?"

It was a yes or no question. No compromise. And despite his resentment, he couldn't turn his back on his friend. His best friend.

"I'm going," he growled back. "I'll drown him myself. Best form of communication I can come up with right now."

Neji released a tired chuckle, and handed him the key. "Don't forget to close on your way out," he reminded the other man, before heading back towards his car.

The building was dark, and he didn't turn on the lights, unwilling to inform the blond that he was here. He never did, anyways. Stripping off his shoes and socks, he put them on the floor just behind the entrance to the men's side of the building, as usual, and walked on. Dropping his bag in the public changing area -he didn't bother with private cubicles at this hour- he advanced through the shower section that preceded the pool, and peered past the foot pool preventing anyone from going through with shoes, into the public area.

The main basin wasn't an Olympic-size pool; it was a 25-meter length (164 feet) instead of 50, but there were diving posts in front of each lane and diving boards on the opposite, deeper side.

A smaller pool separated it from Sasuke's figure, and both surfaces were equally smooth. Frowning, he rolled up his pants, and stepped through the ankle-deep water.

He spotted the chronometer next to one of the diving posts, and trotted up to it, staying well-out of the view of the bottom of the pool, where Naruto was likely to be. He didn't want to interrupt the blond. Crouching as he approached the edge of the water, he checked the chronometer. Seconds were ticking by, but the milliseconds had stopped running, to give space to the minutes. Ten of them.

He didn't even take the time to remove his sweater. Scanning the white bottom for the darker mass he knew was there, he dived straight down, hitting the tiled floor -only ten feet down- with his palms, and whirling around and upright to face the blond.

Naruto sat against the wall, knees pressed against his chest, arms wrapping around them loosely. His eyes had been dully thoughtful, until Sasuke had dived. Now, he inspected the other male with surprised confusion. Not pausing to wonder about the blond's state of ease, Sasuke tucked his hand below the other male's armpits, and tugged him up, wrapping his arms more securely around the tan chest as Naruto uncurled. They surfaced five seconds later, blowing out water to fill their lungs with air. Once Sasuke was certain the blond wasn't on the verge of coma, he glared.

"What the _hell_ is your problem?" he demanded furiously. "I thought we'd settled this ages ago! No diving like this if there isn't anyone to take you out of the water in time, you fucking, _fucking _idiot!" He slammed Naruto against the pool's wall, slowed by the water, but ferocious enough to make the blue eyes widen in panic. "Ten minutes!" he roared. "Ten fucking minutes! I don't care if you want to take on the bloody world championships, you don't try to beat your record with no supervision, _after_ two hours of training for the regular races!" Water dripped down his face as he glared, and Naruto stared at him for several seconds, before finding his voice.

"I didn't..." He shook his head slightly, and wiped the remaining water off his mouth. "I didn't stay under all that time, bastard," he then said. "I wouldn't be breathing this slowly if I had."

Sasuke blinked, then removed one hand from the shoulder it was holding, and pressed it carefully against Naruto's heart. The beat was stronger than usual, but it wasn't the erratic pounding he'd felt at the competition, either. "What was it, then?" he asked, coolly.

"I set it when the lights went off," Naruto replied with a shrug. He looked away. "I just wanted to see how much time you'd take..." He stopped, then reached out of the water, to seize the bars attached to the diving posts. Despite the profoundness of the moment, he did have any kind of support, and treading water didn't work if Sasuke used _him_ as a mean to stay out of the water. "I must've dived three minutes ago. I'm fine, honest."

The dark eyes narrowed suspiciously, scanning every part of him that wasn't submerged.

"Um, why didn't you put your swimsuit on?" Naruto then wondered, shyly.

And snapped up to his again. The blond gulped. "Because obviously some people are getting paranoid," Sasuke finally grumbled. "Neji thought you were trying to drown yourself. Since he doesn't usually get like this, I thought I should make sure."

"He thought I was-" Naruto's eyes widened even more. "Damn," he swore. "You can't even sulk in this place without everyone thinking you're attempting suicide!"

A minuscule smirk flashed upon the pale face. "People tend to overreact, these days," Sasuke agreed in an amused tone. "Glad to see I'm not the only one suffering from it."

"Bastard. What did you have to endure?"

"People's belief that I was going to fall in love with you," was the flat reply. "After you started dating Sai."

"We aren't dating!" Naruto's exclamation echoed inside the wide room. With his free hand, he gripped Sasuke's shoulder. "You never let me explain things after you heard us, bastard, that's why you're the only one acting like that-"

"So what did I overhear?" The tone had cooled again. "I still recall it with enough precision not to let anything pass. You tell me there's a plausible story, other than what I'm imagining?"

"Yeah!" the blond confirmed vehemently. "It was just-" He paused, meek again. "Well, you're going to kill me, but-"

"I told you I wasn't interested in your love affairs," Sasuke replied, dry.

"Fuck it, teme, it wasn't one! We were just eating those Deluxe ice cream cones you'd bought on the week before! 'Cause...'cause since we knew you wouldn't be coming back for some time, and I didn't want to have to throw them away and-"

"Ice cream?" Sasuke repeated. "You were-" He paused, putting the conversation back into the proper setting, and considered. It fit, although the part where Naruto said he'd kill them both- "Wait. You mean the ice cream _I_ bought, with _my_ money, for an evening _I _intended to attend?"

Naruto sent him a dark look. "You're such a selfish bastard," he sighed. "But, um, yeah, those. We didn't eat everything, though," he added hopefully.

Sasuke pushed him back into the water.

When Naruto surfaced again, coughing, he glared at him. "Okay, fine, you were right." He began pulling his sweater off, sinking several inches as he did so. Tossing the garment upon the dry floor, he rose again. "I'm going to kill you."

"Oops." Naruto darted off, and Sasuke rushed after him. Furious splashing ensued, and they soon reached the opposite side of the pool.

The blond performed a perfect flip, and plunged beneath Sasuke as the Uchiha reached the end, following his trail. They returned to their initial spot, and the blond let himself sink, waiting for the other male to catch up.

Sasuke looked down. With the wavelets caused by his constant movement, and the dimness of the place, he had trouble seeing the blond. The pool wasn't very deep on this end, and since Naruto was standing, his head would be roughly as the same level as his lower belly, so he could and did try groping for the blond's scalp, which he soon found. Naruto, however, reached for his shirt.

"What-"

Pushing off the floor, the other male surfaced, grinning mischievously. "What's the big idea, swimming with all your dirty clothes on?" he asked, tugging the shirt again. "The pool's supposed to be a clean area. I'm sure you've put loads of dirt inside the water. Shirt off," he ordered.

Rolling his eyes, Sasuke obeyed. He pulled his jeans off as well, thanking the instinct that had made him store both his cell phone and wallet inside his swimming bag before entering the pool area. These, at least, would be spared.

"Hey, Sasuke," Naruto then said, in a much quieter voice, as the clothes joined the sweater already dripping on the white tiles. "Mind telling me why you were pissed at me like that?"

Sasuke turned, slowly. The water wasn't warm, but his most recent activity kept him from being cold. Naruto, who could stay hours inside any kind of liquid, even without moving, regardless of temperature, stared back, his face finally showing the pain he'd visibly felt in the past weeks. Silence followed.

"I thought we'd promised to be honest with each other," Sasuke finally stated. "And I didn't understand why you keeping Sai- Why you didn't want me to see him, or know who he was." He looked up. "I swear, I wouldn't have made a fuss if the two of you had started dating."

Naruto frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"He had priority, in any case." The words were spoken so quietly that Naruto would never have heard if the water hadn't become perfectly still. He'd gripped the bar, again, just for that. "He admitted he was gay, so he was allowed to love you and-"

"Teme." Naruto's free hand rose out of the water, this time to catch the other male's chin. "Be honest, for once. Are you trying to tell me something?"

Sasuke looked up, then away. His lips tightened together, but as Naruto refused to remove his gentle hold, he sighed.

"I did...get used to it," he finally admitted. "I mean, not- Not the most extravagant stuff, obviously, but other things, like-"

"This?" The tan hand released his chin, sliding to the side of his face. He didn't lean into the caress, but didn't pull back, either. "Or this?" The hand slid down, along the pale chest, to the side, arm wrapping around the waist and gently pulling the other man closer. Sasuke shrugged.

"Something like that," he mumbled.

Naruto smirked. Convincing the bastard of what was going to follow wouldn't be any easier now that he'd started admitting things. If anything, it'd be harder, since now Sasuke was truly aware of what was going on. He leaned forward nonetheless. "May I?" And without waiting for permission -which he'd most likely never get-, he pressed his lips against the pale mouth.

His other hand slowly unclenched, releasing the metal bar. As they began to sink, Sasuke pulled back, frowning. "What-"

But the blond merely smiled. "Take a deep breath," he ordered. And when they both had, they kissed again, and sank through the surface of the water.

Reminiscing, Sasuke recalled how, back in the days where the four of them would still train together, Naruto often spoke about his one curiosity concerning fiction he read on the net.

"_I mean_" -the blond used to say- "_they keep talking about all these kissing sessions where neither of the guys_" _-_because of course he never read het- "_could breathe. I don't see where they get the idea, from; I mean, unless my nose is runny, I can breathe through it just fine when I'm kissing someone._"

Here, though, there really was an air problem. And Sasuke knew he'd never outlast the other male in an apnea contest; if he himself dived, he made sure at least half the time he spent diving lasted while he was above the surface, and left the mysteries of immersion to the blond.

A tongue poked out from the lips pressing against his, careful to keep the pool water out. Hesitantly, he parted his own, then decided, as it explored his mouth, caressing his own, that he maybe he could give this whole thing a go.

Although he wouldn't mind some air, just around now.

Naruto seemed to sense this, because he pulled back, smiling sweetly with just of hint of malice -despite the darkness, the expression was so obvious it was impossible to miss- and sent the other man up.

Air hit his face, and he breathed, panting -from what exactly, he wasn't sure- into the darkness. Hands pushed him back, leading him to the side of the pool, where the dry floor sloped into the water, offering him an easier support than the diving wall. Naruto remained underwater as he advanced, stopping only once Sasuke was completely balanced. Glancing down, he saw the blond look up at him, and suddenly swore.

A flood of bubbles welcomed his slip of tongue, and he realized he must have done more than speak -a jerk, perhaps- because Naruto was obviously laughing, below. As though he hadn't just pressed his hand against the other man's crotch.

"That's what I meant by extravagant things," Sasuke grumbled, more to himself than the blond, who obviously couldn't hear. The hand, however, didn't move from its embarrassing spot, unlike the usual occasions. Naruto was testing the waters.

_Ha ha,_ was the first thought that followed. Then Sasuke forced himself to relax. His entire body was tense, alert, and not making any effort to get better as the seconds passed, seeing the blond didn't seem intent on leaving his inner thigh alone, for once.

It was profoundly odd, to have a hand that wasn't his touch such a part of his anatomy. Especially since it was male. Despite the numerous occasions where the blond had molested him, usually by the time he'd realized what was going on, Naruto was already ten feet away from him, and smirking like a five-year-old prankster. In a sense, there hadn't been that much sexuality in his actions.

Here, however, things were clearly different. The hand remained where it was, mostly still, despite the fingers that had begun prodding his protected skin with a slowness he knew would vanish as soon as he signified he didn't mind. He'd pushed himself up at first, rising an inch or two out of the water, and shivered despite himself against the cool air. At least part of him wanted to return inside the water. Carefully, he lowered his body again.

Naruto's response didn't make him wait. Fingers had slid into action even as he moved, caressing his crotch slowly at first, then, as he didn't tense again, with increasing speed and pressure. Keeping an eye on the room's large clock, Sasuke kept one part of his mind -the part he didn't want analyzing what he was doing- focused on Naruto's time underwater, while the rest gave in to the electrical pulses running through his nerves.

One advantage of having another male touching you was that he knew exactly what felt good. Fingers left his crotch for a split-second, and doubled in number, sliding against his thighs and beneath his boxers, pulling them down completely before handing them to their owner. Distractedly, Sasuke threw them towards the rest of the clothes pile, just as Naruto resurfaced, breathing more heavily than he ought to after such short time. They gazed at each other for another half-instant, and then lips met, pressing and opening. This time, Sasuke forced the two of them to turn around, pushing the panting blond against the wall, and making sure Naruto did indeed manage to breathe through his nose. He felt the blond's warm tongue slip inside his mouth, and battled it with his own, trying to win access to the opposing cavern. He pressed his body against the other male's, irritated by the nylon swimsuit that still clad the blond's waist and crotch. When he began tugging at it, Naruto pulled back.

"You know," he remarked, still breathless, "for someone who was claiming he wouldn't have fussed if I dated some other guy not ten minutes ago, you sure are impatient."

"That's not it," the Uchiha retorted. "I just don't see any reason why I should be the only one naked."

Naruto rolled his eyes. "I'm wearing a swimsuit," he remarked. "You weren't. End of story."

"That might have worked if you hadn't started molesting me again," came the dry retort. "Since you did, the argument isn't valid anymore."

Naruto scoffed. "Bastard."

"Whatever." Sasuke tugged at the nylon again, and the blond gripped his shoulders.

"Wait, wait, Sasuke, wait!" They froze. "Don't-" Naruto's voice was suddenly hoarse. "If you do that I'm going to get hard, teme, and I don't think you want to find out where that leads just yet."

"That's your opinion," was the careless reply. "What do you know?"

"Teme" -the voice was suddenly dry- "I've been counseling people with my orientation ever since I got here, and you saw how many of those that was. Don't start telling me I don't know what I'm talking about."

"I know. But let me remind you I did attend to most of these counseling sessions, and by now am able to recite them by heart. Yes, I know how things work, or where the pleasure spots are, or how it can or can not hurt the first time around-"

"Stop it, stop it! You're ruining the mood with this, bastard! Don't start HBCK-ing me like that here." He pulled the other male against him, and Sasuke realized that he hadn't needed to pull the swimsuit off to arouse the blond. He felt Naruto's member, restricted by the cloth, press against his own, and released a soft, involuntary moan.

"That's better," Naruto whispered, before turning them around again. "Hold on," he then warned. "You're going to need it." And, with one last breath, he slipped underwater once more. A second passed, then-

"Shit!"

Naruto's warning had been useless. Releasing the edge of the pool, Sasuke doubled over, sinking into the water, and curling around the blond head like a cloud of pale oblivion around a blazing sun. Pleasure ran through him in waves, never mind the water, the fact that he couldn't breathe, because even if he'd been on dry land he wouldn't have managed to pull a single breath at the moment. The warm tongue ran along his member, as Naruto's hands caressed his flesh in firm strokes that nearly had him arching back out of the water. The liquid itself was cool, but with the blond's movements caused delicious friction to appear against his skin, causing his to shake in unpredictable patterns. Only when the blond's mouth engulf him whole did he release all of his remaining air and surface again, biting down on his lip to keep himself from making more noise than he already was.

He couldn't do this. It was the most wonderful sensation he'd ever felt, and yet he couldn't allow this, of all things, to-

The dark eyes snapped back to the clock.

One minute.

Hips shaking in raw pleasure, he let Naruto guide his erection in and out of his mouth, not trusting himself to move without hurting the blond. Heat and cold seemed to fuse against his skin, neither permanent or still. Water trickled down his face, and he though with distracted irony of how he'd never be able to face himself if tears of pleasure added to the mix.

Two minutes.

Fingers abandoned his member as Naruto led him even deeper, and slid down between his legs, through his balls, toying slightly, then further even, towards the part where he didn't want to think about, not just yet, but he couldn't think, not with the tight warmth surrounding his member-

Three minutes.

He wondered if Naruto could feel it. The steady, increasing pulse beating against his throat. Wondered if the blond intended to leave his cock where it was, right until the end, and knew that if he did, he wouldn't mind at all. Fingers slowly reached the bottom of what he subconsciously called the dangerous area, since Naruto had never tried touching him there. Yet. Now he did.

Four minutes.

Hands went up, seizing his hips, and made him pull out again, only to trust him back into the blond's mouth. And again, and this time, Naruto's tongue danced wickedly against the tip of his member before pushing it back in again, so that he nearly came. He had to hold.

Five minutes.

He gripped the blond's scalp, understanding Naruto's request that he keep thrusting inside his mouth. He couldn't have refused if he wanted to. The hardest part was keeping a slow pace, worried that he might do serious damage to the blond's throat. Fingers slid back towards his entrance, waiting for him to get used to the pace.

Six minutes.

They slid in. Water wasn't the best lubricant in the world, but at least they had plenty of it. Naruto's middle finger ran along the entrance for several seconds before pushing in, slowly. He clutched at it, jerking at the odd sensation, and then focused on the front of his body as the digit slid completely inside. Naruto was accepting a much bigger intrusion, and he wasn't breathing at all. What were a couple of fingers, compared to that? A second slid in, then a third. It seemed as though the blond was beginning to reach his limit. About time, too. Sasuke didn't know how much time _he_'d be able to hold. Too bad he wasn't given any time to adapt to the intrusion.

Seven minutes.

The fingers were sliding in and out of him, now, and he was beginning to see why. A spring of liquid pleasure had suddenly come to life, unknown to him despite all of Naruto's warnings that it was there, and sent electric fire through his spine every time the digits pressed against it. He had trouble controlling his movements, now; he couldn't keep his eyes on the clock and had to count, second after second, towards Naruto's limit and his own climax, feeling the lips tighten unbearably around his aching member, and then-

Eight minutes.

Everything went white. He jerked once, sinking into the blond's throat as far as he could go, and felt the fingers slam against his prostrate one last time before his climax poured out of him, swallowed by Naruto's welcoming throat. He pulled out as soon as he was done, however, alarmed as he forced the other man up with his feet. Hands shaking, he reached for the blond's heart, fearing the worst. He'd stayed under long, much too long, especially since he was moving-

Naruto coughed, sputtered, and gripped Sasuke's shoulders as though to prevent himself from sinking into oblivion. "Get me out of the water," he croaked.

He didn't need to be told twice. Making sure the blond stayed above the surface, Sasuke pushed himself out, and caught the blond by the waist, tugging with all his strength. Naruto slid out, slowly, but surely, and let the other man help him sit up, but shook his head when Sasuke began slapping his back.

"Didn't swallow anything I didn't want to," he assured, grinning. "I'm fine."

"You should be dead," Sasuke replied curtly. "What was the big idea, delaying like you did? I told you to come up!"

"I had to finish," the blond protested. "How long?"

"Eight minutes," the Uchiha grumbled. "Give or take a few seconds. I didn't see at what second you started."

"That's good," Naruto grinned at him. "We'll count properly tomorrow," he promised. "This was way easier than my last record."

"You're sure you feel fine?" Sasuke asked. "Not light-headed?"

Naruto remained thoughtfully silent, and Sasuke's eyes went down.

"Oh."

"I changed my mind," the blond admitted. "I can't wait a few days, for you to get used to it, teme. But I thought you could afford to have me loosen you up a bit-"

Sasuke snorted. "I can't believe you. You nearly drown yourself with my dick down your throat and when you come out, not only do you still want sex, but you're worried _I'll_ get hurt. You're mad. Completely crazy."

"Well, I'm used to my kind of pain." Naruto grinned sheepishly. "You aren't used to the one I'm offering you. And you're already done for tonight."

Sasuke hit him over the head. "Don't treat me like an old man, dobe. I can have more than one go."

Naruto looked up at him. "Fuck." Turning sideways, he seized the Uchiha and pulled him against his chest, cradling the pale body with his legs. "You're making me get even harder," he breathed. "I'm going to climax before we even start getting you worked up again."

"Don't bet on that," came the soft grumble. He could feel something had press against his entrance though the nylon. "Fuck it, dobe, take the goddamn swimsuit off! It's so tight even I can tell it hurts!"

Naruto chuckled from behind him. "Why don't you do that?" he asked.

Flushing, Sasuke turned around. Following his suggestion, Naruto leaned back, laying down on the cool floor once more, allowing easier access to his hips. His erection was clearly visible.

Biting his lips, the Uchiha mentally punched himself. He couldn't stop things now, not after what had just happened. In any case, he didn't want it to. The liquid fire that had flared up his spine all the way down to his feet had sprung from a place Naruto's fingers had barely grazed. If this was what they provoked, he needed to know what proper contact created.

Just as the blond had done with his boxers, he slid his hands against the thighs and beneath the tight fabric. Naruto lifted his hips accordingly, and allowed the other man to remove his last item of clothing. The azure orbs had vanished behind closed eyelids. Despite his claims of well-being, the blond was obviously exhausted, although his freed erection still demanded proper attention. Sasuke nearly smirked. He'd always known Naruto was the hugest pervert one could ever hope to find.

Advancing on all fours, he lowered his hips, allowing the foreign member to slide against his skin. Naruto didn't open his eyes, but his lips parted, and he released a soundless moan.

"Think I'm prepared enough, dobe?" the Uchiha inquired mischievously. "Or should I take some additional time to make absolutely sure?"

"You fucking...bastard," Naruto groaned. "I swear I'll kill you once I have enough energy to- Aw, shit..." The last word came as a relieved breath, and somehow the blond found strength to push his hips up again sinking deeper into the other male's virgin entrance. Sasuke winced.

"Do it slowly," he growled. "I'm not as used to this as you are..."

This time, the azure eyes opened into slits. "Are you calling me a slut?"

"Did I say anything?" Sasuke snapped back. "Who's fucking who, dobe?"

Naruto smiled. "Never thought you'd let me."

There was a breathless snort from above him. "Never did either," the Uchiha replied. "Now stop moving and let me do this."

Obediently, Naruto lowered his hips again, glad to feel the Sasuke follow him down, and lower himself even more. The tight flesh clutched him and then relaxed forcefully, and each time the raven-hair gained an inch or two. One minute later, he'd reached Naruto's hips.

"Fuck," the blond swore.

"Fuck," Sasuke echoed, panting. "You need bigger vocabulary." He smirked as Naruto glared.

"Aren't you using the exact same as mine?" the other male asked, indignant. "Who cares about vocabulary?" Tight muscles clenched around his member, and he moaned, lifting his hips off the floor again. "Fuck it, teme, if you don't move I'll-"

"Do what, exactly?" the Uchiha wanted to know. Despite this, he rose a few inches, experimentally, and sank down again. Naruto swore. "Why does it look like I'm the veteran here?" he then asked.

This time, the blond pushed himself up, and Sasuke nearly lost his balance. "I'll show you who's got more experience, bastard," he growled. "I thought I could let you have your fun, so you could heal some of your wounded ego, but since it looks absolutely fine..." He leaned forward, holding Sasuke's upper body with his arms and lowering it to the cool floor. The pale man hissed at the contact, and Naruto smirked as he repositioned himself. "Don't worry," he consoled the other man. "You're going to feel so good you're going to forget that we're doing on cold floor." He pulled back, slowly, allowing Sasuke to become aware of exactly what he was losing, and thrust back in, smirk widening as the other male released another involuntary moan.

There was nothing to hold on to. With each thrust, Naruto brought them closer to the edge of the pool, and Sasuke made no attempt to keep them from reaching it. Raw pleasure pounded through each of his nerves, so powerful that he thought he might faint if this kept up. Trembling with exhaustion, he urged the other man on nevertheless, and felt his scalp suddenly cool with the first wavelets of the basin's water. Two thrusts later, they had both plunged.

Sasuke quickly realized that submersion most definitely wasn't a good idea in his state of breath. Already panting before, he choked against the liquid, and felt Naruto pull out of him in order to seize him properly, and lead him back to the surface.

He disengaged himself. Now that the torturing bliss had stopped, he'd regained at least some control over his limbs, and could afford to swim. They'd landed on a deeper part of the pool, and it took him a few seconds to return to the surface. Blowing out the water his mouth and nose contained, he reached for the solid edge in front of him and pushed himself out of the water.

Just as his hips rose out of the surface, a pair of hands halted his movements, clutching him firmly until he was still. He heard Naruto's head poke out of the water, as the hands slid down to spread his butt cheeks apart. Then, a warm tongue pressed against his entrance, actively destroying any remaining trace of his control. His arms gave way, and his entire upper body crumbled on the cool, dry surface, while Naruto's hands and head kept him from sinking back into the water.

"You fucking- bastard," he gritted out, biting back a helpless moan. The sensation was entirely new, and completely different from what had preceded it. Quivering, he pushed back against Naruto's mouth, yearning to feel more. But the traitorous tongue could only go so far, and he wanted -needed- more.

"Fuck!" he cried, arching as fingers added themselves to the mix. "Will you stop teasing and get back to doing your bloody job?"

The tongue vanished, and he released a slight sigh of relief mixed with desperation. Then-

"Don't move."

The fingers came out as well, and hands placed themselves on either side of Sasuke's waist. Turning, he saw Naruto push himself up, emerging from the pool like a water god from its sacred sea. Without even pausing, the blond male buried himself inside his opening, and this time did not wait. His thrusts became more erratic as both his and Sasuke's climax drew near, and it wasn't long before the latter was once again blinded by an immaculate mist.

He felt the blond pull out of him, still panting harder than Sasuke had ever heard him. He'd pushed the two of them out of the pool as they'd gone over the edge, thoughtfully preventing his new lover from releasing inside the water. Instead, the white substance had landed directly inside the small canal right next to the basin's edge, which collected the dirty waters.

Seconds passed, silent but for the two men's laborious breathing. Then, finally, Sasuke smirked. "And to think that not once did I think I was going to drown," he sighed ruefully. "Suffocate, yes. But the water never got the better of me."

"Teme," the blond groaned. "Please don't tell me you still want to do laps after this."

A raven eyebrow rose. "After I scorned Neji for coming to check if I did them? It wouldn't be serious."

"Keep going and I'm dumping you back into the pool." Naruto groaned, then sat up. "For once, the roles are switched." He smirked. "Please? I need to sleep a bit, but I want to stay with you."

"You'd better," the Uchiha grumbled. "I can't feel my ass."

"Seriously?" The blond edged over, worried. "I knew we should've used lube, this was crazy to do something like this on your first time-" He reached for Sasuke's waist and went down, this time inspecting the skin with much more gentleness than before. "I don't think you're bleeding," he whispered. "You really don't-"

"Dobe." The tan hands were pushed away. "Stop using every excuse you have to molest me. I'm fine." He straightened completely. "Just a bit stiff."

Naruto released a small chuckle. "I'll carry you if you want," he offered.

"I'll walk," Sasuke sighed dryly. "I don't suppose you brought spare clothes, though."

Naruto shook his head. "You can use my shirt and towel," he offered. "I'll drive." He got to his feet, and pulled the other man up, watchful for any sign of pain Sasuke might show. There was none, apart from a slight wince as he straightened.

As they picked up the discarded clothing, Sasuke suddenly turned back towards the blond. "The ice cream story's very nice and all," he remarked, "but it doesn't explain why Sai didn't want me to see him."

"It wasn't just you," Naruto replied with a shrug. "It was anyone from your section." He glanced toward the pool area's sole door leading to the exterior. "I don't think Neji waited to see if we'd come back out this fast," he then remarked.

Sasuke frowned, confused. "Why would he? What does that have to do with-" He paused, eyes widening. "Neji?" he repeated, thunderstruck.

Naruto nodded, smirking. "They have a date tonight. I had to use my time effectively _some_ way. He told me he was ready to try, and Sai was a ready as we could make him, so..." He shrugged. "Hopefully, things could go well."

"He thought I wouldn't be able to hold my mouth?"

"He was shy," Naruto sighed as they reached the showers, and rinsed. "Quit sounding like a victim, teme," he sighed over the pouring water. "He was totally new at this, and scared shitless at what people might say if they found out. Especially the guy he was flashing on."

Shaking his head, Sasuke stepped out from beneath his shower, and headed to his swimming bag. Removing the towel folded inside, he began drying himself, and turned, only to spot the blond observing him.

"Did I ever tell you how nice-looking your ass was?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke glared at him. "You stop that right now, Uzumaki. I know where that perverted mind of yours is going, so let me make things perfectly clear; next time we're having sex, not only will we do it in a real bed, and _never_ again on something this hard and cold, but in addition, I'm top."

This time it was Naruto that raised an eyebrow. "You sure you'll be able to handle it?" he asked, amused.

Sasuke smirked back. "I learn fast," he promised. "And to tell you the truth I don't think my body will tolerate this kind of activity more than once a month."

"So you're willing to do it again?" the blond asked, hopefully incredulous.

The smirk widened. "Once in a while," he replied. "But I'll be filling the gaps. I don't think you'll have too much trouble dealing with that."

"You arrogant prick." Naruto chuckled, then stepped over. Leaning forward, he kissed the other man lightly, then smiled into the darkness. "Alright, teme, my ass and heart are both yours. Handle them with care."

* * *

**Not my best. I'm struggling with the end of another fic, which I won't hand you before I've written it out completely. Supposedly it's a oneshot. **

**The Joys of Parenthood should be the title of said fic, and I personally like it (except the crappy ending- I always make crappy endings, and then take months to change them, when I have the courage)**.

**Please wait for it, although I wouldn't mind reviews for this one. Another experimentation with the pool scene. Tell me what you think.**


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